I am so over the over glorification of busyness and overworking ourselves. This culture that we must fill every moment of our day, and do everything and be everything for everyone is a little toxic. All this obsession about doing, does not leave us in a position to simply be and enjoy.
Instead of packing every moment of our day, I would rather embrace a lifestyle where I am spending my time and energy in a way that is in alignment with my goals and desires. If you are ready to let go of this over glorification of hectic schedules and embrace a simpler way of living, try these tips:
Question Your “Shoulds”. We do so much out of obligation, out of what we “should” do based on societal pressures. I encourage you to take a moment to reflect on all the things you are doing on a day-to-day basis without question. Ask yourself ”Is this something I want to do?”, if the answer is no, ask yourself “Is this something I have to do?”. This is the hard part because we have been trained to think we need to do everything. Reflect on what would happen if you stopped doing it, delegated it to someone else (including hiring someone else) or possibly changed the way you did it so it was more tolerable. For instance, for some unknown reason I dislike grocery stopping and will put it off for days if I can. Finally I had the thought, why am I spending days telling myself “I should go grocery shopping” and dreading the trip to the store when I can easily set up a grocery delivery program to take care of that chore for me.
Remember All of Your Yes’s are Also No’s. I truly believe that our default answer when people ask us to do something is, yes, however we aren’t truly aware of what we are giving up when we are making that choice. When you say yes to one thing, you are inherently saying no to something else. For instance, by working a little later in the evening you might be unconsciously saying no to your family who you were planning to be spending time with. It is important to get clear on what your priorities are and say yes to those things and say no to the things that are taking away from your priorities.
Be Clear About Your Boundaries. Once you find clarity around what your priorities are and the “shoulds” you are choosing to no longer do, it is important to stick to those decisions. This might mean reflecting on whether you are spending your time in alignment with your goals and priorities or clearly communicating to those around you how you are no longer prioritizing certain things or learning how to say no. Sticking to our boundaries and decisions is easier said than done.
Embrace Different Seasons of Your Life. I think balance is an unattainable thing to strive for, I feel like trying to juggle everything is setting ourselves up for failure. I rather look at life as different seasons, where your priorities change with time. For instance, one season you might be prioritizing a new relationship by spending more time with them, one season you might be focusing on your health by spending more time in the gym and getting to bed on time and in another season you might be focusing more time than normal on work due to some upcoming deadlines. Instead of trying to balance everything, focus on the season that you are currently in and use your time and energy accordingly. In the process, give yourself some grace as you intentionally focus less on other things.
I hope you truly take time to reflect on your current lifestyle and how you can simplify things. I guarantee the decision to intentionally forgo the busyness will be so worth it, although it might feel a little unnatural in the process.
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